New Mystery Ingredient In Canadian Pizza

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This certainly will be a kick-start to lagging pulp-and-paper industry:

Heralding its new offerings as the culmination of nine years of intense laboratory research, Tim Hortons president Axel Schwan proudly announced that the franchise’s new lineup of pizzas are made with 100% Canadian cardboard.

“We’re a proudly Canadian institution and we want to showcase the best Canada has to offer,” said Schwan, in a statement to reporters. “That’s why our dough is made with nothing but the finest Newfoundland pulp.”

To read the full story of this innovative process, click here for the Beaverton.

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2 Responses

  1. MM says:

    You get a free boat with every purchase.

  2. Ron Benn says:

    Clearly the Beaverton writer has eaten at least one bite of a Tim’s pizza.

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